-The other other day, I saw a classmate of mine leaving a building with a big sandwich. He reached up to take a big chomp just as he exited, and when his mouth was about a centimeter away from that eagerly anticipated first bite, the closing door swung into his elbow, which knocked his arm and subsequently shifted his sandwich approximately three inches to the right of where he had planned on finding it, so he bit down on air and it was HILARIOUS. In a cartoon world, his teeth would have tinkled like shattered glass out of his mouth, still frozen in mid-chomp.
10.27.2008
All Hallows' Eve
-The other day I got out of the shower and a spider fell out of my towel. I dispatched the spider immediately (obviously), but couldn't shake the fear that maybe there were more spiders waiting for me in that towel. I eventually dried off with my auxiliary towel, then placed that towel next to the spider towel in hopes that by the next day I would forget about the awful episode entirely, or, failing at that, at the very least forget which was the spider towel and which was not, to prevent holding one towel in higher esteem than the other. I think the probability of finding a spider inside a towel hanging on a towel rack on any given day has to be around 1/730, so it's funny that I'm scared I will find a second or third still lurking in the folds, the probability of which is probably in the neighborhood of 1/53290. Statistically, I should be relieved, and say, "Phew, I got this one out of the way, and it fell out of my towel before it could touch me, that wasn't so bad," and then look forward to two spider-free years.